Anonymous poster on message board: So, some guy at work turned me on to this concept of "radical honesty". Here is what it is, in a nutshell:

Radical Honesty is a kind of communication that is direct, complete, open and expressive. Radical Honesty means you tell the people in your life what you've done or plan to do, what you think, and what you feel. It's the kind of authentic sharing that creates the possibility of love and intimacy.

The practice of Radical Honesty is based on the work and writings of Dr. Brad Blanton, a psychologist who found that the best way to reduce stress, make life work, and heal the past was to tell the truth.

So basically, you aren't allowed to lie, even little white ones to protect people's feelings, and you must tell people what's on your mind, without using the little filter between your brain and mouth that tells you to shut up sometimes.

I'm trying it out, but am not able to commit fully. I fear hurting people. An example of an early attempt:

Becky: At work today, I had to deal with this creep supplier that...

Me: Hold on, I have to pee.

Becky: Let me finish.

Me: I resent the fact that you're hurting my kidneys for the sake of a story I know is going to suck.

Becky: You don't have to be an a****** about it.

Me: (crickets, gone to pee).

Becky, upon my return: So, you want I should finish my story?

Me: I hope to god there's a payoff to this story for once.

Becky: F*** you, a******.

My thoughts on this:

1) This reminds me of the Seinfeld where Becky from Full House got Jerry to get angry and yell, and then he started puking these feelings of love all over Elaine and George. Becky looked hot in that episode.

2) I frequently combat the forces of "being real" that pervade 21st Century Christian thought, basically the same idea. The problem is, when you let your "real" thoughts out, they are usually the lesser half of who you'd like to be, the negative thoughts and doubts. I have good and bad thoughts about almost everyone and everything at every moment. I choose to verbalize and act on the ones that take steps toward me becoming who I'd like to become, instead of the ones that will only cause trouble or make me a weak and needy person. "Radical honesty" is bull.

It's not good to tell bald-faced lies all the time. Then, you become a liar who can't be trusted, which is presumably not the sort of person you want to be. If you refrain from being an a****** every now and again, choosing someone else's feelings over spewing out your own, you act selflessly and are actually being compassionate. These are good things. Continually spouting forth what you really think about things, regardless of other people's feelings, is selfish and not radical at all. Spilling your deepest concerns to anyone and everyone certainly spreads a lot of anxiety and worry, which are sins when you get right down to it. Down with "Radical Honesty"! Up with being a decent, caring, and stable person!