President 2008

I should have gone on the record before Super Tuesday, but since we didn't really learn anything new from it, I don't mind saying this now.

Let it be known that I'm not much for politics. The Presidency is one of the world's biggest popularity contests. The ideas, the issues, the stances are all out there and have been since the beginning. The tide turns on lies and truths that come out later.

This being said, John McCain will be the next President. No matter whether Hillary or Obama wins. The country is usually split about 50/50 Democrat and Republican, with the decision left up to the people riding the fence who might decide to show up and vote whichever way the wind is blowing. McCain has some crossover appeal and a lot of experience that will make him look good in the debates. His two potential opponents have neither in the same quantities.

Hillary should be getting the woman vote, but she can't even get Oprah to back her. How in the world we expect to get a woman President without Oprah's backing, I don't know. I guess Oprah decided she'd stick up for the other political minority she's a part of.

Obama is kind of an asshole. I'm not saying he's not capable. I'm not saying his words don't ring true with a lot of people. But if you listen to the guy, watch his facial expressions, see what happens when he gets riled up in an interview, Mr. Obama gets a little self-righteous. He doesn't have universal appeal. He's good at preaching to the choir, but there's no reason that choir will include Republicans.

No, McCain has it. He's old and old people vote. He's a white male and represents the status quo, which is good enough for a lot of people. He also did some bipartisan work on Campaign Finance Reform, which still needs a hell of a lot of work, but continues to stick him in people's minds as a uniter, not a divider.

Another problem for the two Dems right now? Each other. John McCain and his meager multimillion dollar budget can now ignore Mitt Romney and Mike Huckabee and the far right wing of the party. He can pursue a centrist message as a universal candidate. Hillary and Obama still have to duke it out. Either they're going to come to a consensus and run on a double-political-minority ticket, which would be novel but suicidal, or else things are going to get ugly while they take off the gloves and try to win the nomination. That would mire them in a bunch of "who's the bigger blue-stater" posturing that would probably keep their victories to the blue states.

HOW THINGS COULD CHANGE:

1) McCain picks a lousy Veep. Get somebody young, dynamic, and more conservative. Attract the hipsters for change and the farts for stagnancy. See if he can do it all in one.

2) McCain runs an ineffective national campaign. Pulls a Rudy, if you will. He can't let the dueling change hounds steal the spotlight during the next month or two. He has to take full advantage of his opportunity instead of sitting back and waiting. Then, it will be too late.

3) Hillary and Obama turn the debate from who's more for change into who's got a better stab at the Sepulchral Manse. Both have claimed to be the candidates for change and are very similar on most points, even though Hillary's change fell out of her pocket only after she started losing ground. One needs to convince us they're ready for Washington. More ready than McCain.

I just don't see it. In America the Shortsighted, the game may already be over. I'm not even sure I'll vote. All depends on if I get my printer hooked up to send the paperwork in. You heard it here first. John McCain will win in 2008.